What does it say about me that when I walk into Maria Goretti Nkumba’s office, and the more than 10 versions of pink visually assault me, I spend 15 minutes interrogating her on her colour palette? Growing up in modern Kenya reminds you that beautiful people get away with practically anything: it is an aesthetic-tocracy. That would be, of course, one way to look at it.
The other is that she’s a girl’s girl. A Barbie, the girl who says goodbye in the rain. Until she reveals herself as the kind of girl you have no idea she could be, except maybe you should have imagined as much. “What did I know about being a parent at 25?” “It felt like a failure—not the conception, but the marriage.” “I’ll forgive you, but karma will get you.” She doesn’t speak in right angles, in forked tongues. No. She’s not that kind of girl.
Maria Goretti is named after the young Italian saint known for her magnanimity and mercy—and forgiveness—the irony is not lost on me. This Maria, the pinky Maria, is making her name as the CEO of Xperia, an events management company—worrying whether she will be a good enough leader—and good enough as a leader. She is nailing her colours to the mast—salmon pink, baby pink, hot pink, light pink, light hot pink, et al. and somehow, they all blend in a dizzying alchemy, like finding the value of x. It feels like a small miracle, like the conversion of Paul [bibilical Paul, previously Saul].
What’s the story of the pink hues?
I have always been a pink girl. That colour is a constant for me; it keeps me calm and gives me serenity. My sister designed this office, but she instinctively knew from childhood that this was my colour.
What do you remember about your childhood?
Wow. I grew up in a village in Murang’a County. My mother is from Kangema. From primary to secondary school, we went to schools in Muran’ga. I first set foot in Nairobi when I came to the university in 2007. I remember growing up in a community, and it’s true: It takes a village to raise a child.
What was your favourite game as a child?
Kati. Bano (marbles), and we cycled a lot in the estate. My mom was the principal of my school, so all the teachers’ children would come together and do activities.
Do you still cycle?
I did a refresher at Enishipai Resort last year, so let’s say I still have the skill, haha! After that, my bum was on fire.
What’s your favourite childlike activity to do?
Jumping on the trampoline with my daughter. We just did one recently at Sarit Centre. She is 10, turning 11 this year.
How’s your motherhood experience?
It’s amazing. I became a mother at 25 when I didn’t know what motherhood entailed. Looking back now, I marvel at how little I knew about parenthood. But I was privileged to raise her in the village where my mother would help me. Right now, we have a beautiful relationship, almost like sisters. I love it when she sees me growing in my career. She wants to take over the business. [chuckles]
What has motherhood taken from you?
Whoof! Impatience. I was never a patient person. It has taught me resilience and how to show up, even when I don’t want to.
And what has it given you?
Unconditional love and a purpose; that drives me to work toward something bigger than myself.
How are you raising your daughter differently from how you were raised?
I am not trying to do it differently. Along the way, we have lost sense of what is important—community. Growing up, our parents instilled that authenticity of life in us. Playtime was not an individual affair; we played outside with other children. We regularly went to see our grandparents to keep that connection strong. I am taking her back to her roots. I want her to appreciate that she is not just a city girl. I am teaching her to give back and be compassionate to other people.
You mentioned getting a child young. What was that like?
It was not easy telling my parents I was pregnant, but I always wanted to be a mom at 25; at least, it was something I always said. I was engaged to be married to her father, but it didn’t work out. I felt like a failure—not from the conception, but the marriage that never was. I took time to introspect and accept that this is my reality as a single mother; she is now my responsibility. I am grateful for the community I had, for I never felt alone.
Do you have a special ritual between you and your daughter?
Haha! We have mother-daughter dates—lunch, dinner, spa, et al. We also pray every day before we sleep. We are staunch Catholics.
What did your last heartbreak teach you?
Phew, God! It taught me the necessity of being true to yourself, even in a relationship. It can either break or make the relationship.
How do people show you love?
By giving me gifts. [chuckles] Loyalty is big for me. Trust too and when someone makes time to be with me.
As a mother and businesswoman, can one have it all at this stage of your career?
No. Maybe I am still learning, but you can learn to be content with what you have.
What’s the one question you keep asking yourself?
Will I make an impact in our industry? When I am gone, will they remember my name?
How do you take care of Maria?
I take time out, and I always know when it is time to do it. I do not burn myself out, not for business or anyone.
Where do you go?
My partner is a pilot, so I am privileged to get a few free tickets. I go to Dubai or Cape Town. But locally, Naivasha, Nanyuki or Amboseli.
What’s one place you went that shifted the way you think?
Ooh. Cape Town. It’s authentic as compared to Dubai, where everything has been built by humans. But Cape Town, most of it is God’s creation, from the mountains to the rivers and lakes. It made me see the profoundness of God and who we are in the essence of life.
What’s one place you want to go to?
Japan. It’s the one culture that always has cherry blossoms and I love cherry blossoms.
What’s that special thing you do just for yourself?
Show up for myself and put myself together.
What’s that item you bought for less than Sh10,000 that you use often?
Haha! My charger? It’s always in my bag. I can’t imagine my phone ever going off. I go back for my power bank every time.
What’s that absurd thing or habit that you love doing?
I love jumping on the trampoline. I find it so liberating, and I have only recently come to enjoy it.
Do you live by any particular mantra?
Tenda wema nenda zako. Do good and be on your way. It will always come back to you.
Which smell reminds you of a particular place or time?
Cow dung [chuckles] reminds me of my childhood because we had to milk the cows every day.
Are you where you want to be in life?
I am where I never thought I’d be in life. If you told me during the Covid-19 pandemic that I would be here, I would call you a lair.
What does your mother say to you now?
She’s proud of me. She always saw me as a little girl. She saw my evolution, but it took her some time to accept it. And I know she prays for me every day; she attends church every day at 1 pm.
Do you come from a long line of tough women?
Yes. I have an older sister and an older brother who passed away at 25. I have thought about what you are thinking right now, how he left us at 25, and I got my daughter at 25.
Who has been the most important person in your life?
God. He has been a constant. We were raised to believe in a higher power, and that nothing happens by your strength.
What aspect of faith do you struggle with?
Forgiveness. I am working on it, and I forgive immediately these days. I say to myself, ‘This is not my battle, I have released you’.
Which phone app do you use the most?
Instagram.
How would you like people to experience you?
In my authentic self—the real person I am, not pretending to be someone I am not. I want them to experience my kindness, loyalty, and trust.
What have you been putting off for some time?
Haha! Sky diving. Shouldn’t this be off the record? Haha! My partner won’t let me do it. We are still yet to come to a compromise.
What’s your insecurity?
Whoof! I had insecurities about my body for some time, and I feel like I am just coming out of it. Hold on, let me think. [long pause]. Maybe it is more of a fear—having a business and having people who depend on me has been tough. Will I be good enough as a leader? How will I delegate and trust my team to run things without me?
Are you a head or a heart person?
Which is easier—being a mom or a CEO?
Mom. Maybe it’s because I have had help, but being a CEO is a different ball game. Things are just starting to fall into place.
What’s the most challenging part of being a CEO?
People look up to you as a leader. It hasn’t been by design that most of my team is women; I think it was meant to happen. There are many stereotypes about women working together, and I have age groups that range from 25 to the 50s. There is a lot of variation in how you deal with them, but I am up to the task.
What’s the most boring part about being you?
I sleep a lot. Even in the car, I black out. We recently went to my dad’s memorial in Kampala—our paternal home is seven hours from Kampala—and I think I slept all the way through.
Your dad was Ugandan?
Yes, he was half Ugandan, half Rwandese. I am an East African.
Is it safe to assume that you were a standout child in the village?
Our mother was a principal in Murang’a, so we had access to the school van. We had some privileges, and since my father worked in Uganda, we would visit over the holidays. We always had stories to bring back.
What is something difficult you go through that not many get to see?
Wow. My emotions sometimes run wild. It’s a cliché to say it is very lonely at the top, but I sometimes wonder who I can trust. What am I supposed to do with everything ahead of me, who can I talk to? Sometimes, I am not able to voice them.
Who has your back?
God. I know many people do, but human beings will let you down.
What’s the most painful thing you’ve been told?
You are taking advantage with your questions, haha! I remember being told, “You are not good enough.”
What’s your superpower?
I am a good organiser. I get things done. In every area of my life, I have systems in place, moving.
What have you finally come to terms with?
The loss of my brother and father. The end of Covid-19 too was a dark moment for me, and I had anxiety thinking, ‘Will I go back to the same place?’ I had to come to terms with the fact that I am where I am supposed to be; every experience has led me to this point, both good and bad.
How does loss affect how you view success?
Whoof. I don’t take anything for granted. You can have it and lose it in the same measure. But when you succeed in something, celebrate it, don’t wait. How do you know you will be there tomorrow? I celebrate every moment and experience. I plan the birthdays of the people in my life, I do whatever needs to be done to celebrate.
What are you thanking yourself for?
For never giving up and always showing up.
What are you apologising to yourself for?
Not seeing myself for who I am. Each day I make a conscious decision to applaud and tell myself who I am and who I was born to be.
Have you forgiven yourself?
Yes. I have been working with a life coach, and since last week, we have been doing exercises in forgiving oneself. It’s been very healing.
What’s your weekend soundtrack?
Nyashinski’s Perfect Design. I am obsessed. This week however it has been Sinach’s latest track, Confessions.
Are you a hopeless romantic?
With no apologies.
What is the most romantic thing someone has done for you?
My partner is not that romantic so I am teaching him—but he tries. When it comes to romance, if you just randomly call me and say we are going out of town, you’ve melted my heart.