If your sex life has taken a discernible dip recently, you’re not alone. Studies suggest that 75 per cent of women over 40 feel their sex drive decreasing, while 40 per cent of men over 45 experience low testosterone levels, which can cause erectile dysfunction and lower libido.
But while it’s easy to assume that declining sexual desire and performance are just an inevitable part of getting older, there are actually many ways to boost both without visiting a doctor. A healthy lifestyle can have a major impact, not just by raising self-esteem and energy levels, but by improving blood flow and sex hormones.
Here are some simple lifestyle changes for men and women to help reinvigorate your sexual relationship.
Men
Do push-ups and squats
“Patients with erectile dysfunction generally have a body weight and waist circumference on average higher than healthy patients,” says Dr Luke Pratsides, a GP and the head of medical at Numan. Higher levels of body fat can cause higher levels of sex hormone-binding globulin, which binds to testosterone and prevents it stimulating desire. It can also cause decreased blood flow in the genitals due to a narrowing of the blood vessels, making it more difficult to achieve and maintain erections.
Maintaining a healthy weight via diet and exercise is one of the most effective ways of improving libido and sexual performance. “Exercise is an incredibly powerful tool in the management of male midlife sexual dysfunction, as the maintenance of muscle mass can help counteract declining testosterone levels, which decline by an average of 1 per cent each year from the start of a man’s 30s,” says Dr Pratsides.
Resistance exercise, like push-ups, can naturally nudge up testosterone levels. However, you might also want to add in lower-body exercises that use bigger muscles for an added testosterone lift.
Eat berries and broccoli
A new study suggests a diet rich in fruits, vegetables, grains and nuts, and which limits meat and dairy, could be particularly effective in combating erectile dysfunction. Scientists at New York University Grossman School of Medicine and the Harvard T H Chan School of Public Health studied 3,500 men with prostate cancer, of which erectile dysfunction is a common side effect, and found that the diet improved their sex lives by up to 11 per cent.
“Multicoloured fruits and vegetables contain high levels of flavonoids, which have anti-inflammatory effects,” says Laura Southern, a nutritionist at London Food Therapy. “Berries, grapes and greens such as spinach and broccoli are very good for keeping our blood pumping and supporting our arteries.” This is vital for erections, which require the arteries to expand to increase the blood flow to the penis. Nitrates also cause blood vessels to relax and widen, improving erections. “Beetroot, garlic, pine nuts and watermelon are all excellent sources,” adds Southern.
Tuck into sardines
One recent study of 136 men found that vitamin B12 deficiency was identified in 26.7 per cent of patients with sexual desire disorder (lack of desire for sex). Sardines are an excellent source of the vitamin, or it can be taken in supplement form.
In Britain, 6 per cent of adults under 60 and 20 per cent of those over 60 have a vitamin B12 deficiency, which usually manifests in fatigue. If you’re feeling unusually tired, request a blood test via the GP.
Fish, particularly shellfish, is also a major source of zinc, which supports testosterone production in men and progesterone production in women, making it essential for both sexes. “There’s a reason oysters have traditionally been seen as an aphrodisiac – they contain high levels of zinc,” says Southern. It’s found in other types of seafood, nuts and whole grains, too, but supplementing is also wise.
Try flossing
Many studies have confirmed a strong link between gum disease and erectile dysfunction, including one in the Journal of Peridontology which revealed that men with severe gum disease are more than twice as likely to suffer from erectile dysfunction than those with healthy teeth and gums.
Chronic inflammation caused by gum disease can damage the endothelial cells, which form the lining of the blood vessels – including those in the penis. This can result in impaired blood flow throughout the body, and problems achieving and maintaining erections. Good oral hygiene and regular professional cleaning can prevent this.
Fix your snoring
Research suggests that around half of men with sleep apnea also suffer from erectile dysfunction, which is likely to be because they have lower levels of testosterone. Tackling sleep apnea with methods including losing weight, oral appliances which reposition the jaw to open the airway, or a continuous positive airway pressure (CPAP) machine, has also been proven to help erectile dysfunction. The GP is the first port of call for a referral for a sleep evaluation.
Women
Choose healthy fats
As women approach menopause and afterwards, oestrogen levels drop dramatically, which can have a major impact on sexual function, lowering desire and making it more difficult to become aroused. “The majority of menopausal women will develop symptoms related to vaginal dryness,” says Dr Alice Duffy, a former GP who runs Health in Menopause, a private clinic in Nottingham. “It can make sex very painful.”
Eating good fats such as oily fish, avocado, nuts, seeds and olive oil can help support the body to produce lubrication. “If you’re not eating these regularly, you might want to add an omega-3 supplement to your diet,” says Southern. An adequate omega-3 intake is also linked to a healthy blood flow around the body, which is important for libido.
Eat an apple a day
One study of 731 women found that eating an apple a day over six months improved arousal, lubrication and satisfaction, possibly due to the antioxidants increasing blood flow. Apples also contain a phytoestrogen that may help with vaginal dryness.
Use topical oestrogen
Women can consider hormone replacement therapy, or HRT, which restores oestrogen and progesterone. “HRT can address women’s vaginal symptoms, which makes them more likely to want sex, helps with arousal and also makes sex feel better when it happens,” says Dr Duffy.
Vaginal oestrogen, a topical treatment – gels, creams or pessaries – applied in the genital area with very little absorption into the bloodstream, is the lowest-risk form of HRT. “For those who only want to use local vaginal oestrogen, it’s really effective at getting rid of the vaginal symptoms,” says Dr Duffy. Vaginal oestrogen is available on prescription, apart from the brand Gina which is available at pharmacies, without a prescription.
Experiment alone
A new, first-of-its-kind study shows that women who have had Covid-19 have less desire, arousal, satisfaction and fewer orgasms compared to those who have never been infected. The researchers at Boston University suggest that long Covid could alter blood flow to the genitals, resulting in less arousal. Previous studies have shown that the condition can damage the delicate lining of blood vessels, disrupting flow around the body.
Declining oestrogen during menopause also results in reduced blood circulation to the vulva, vagina and clitoris. Masturbation can increase blood flow, help to relieve tissue and moisture problems, and increase sexual desire. “Orgasms are fantastic for improving the blood supply to the pelvis to keep those tissues healthy,” says Dr Duffy. She recommends using a lubricant such as Sutil, which has a balanced pH which won’t dry or irritate skin. “Start to engage with your sexual function on your own and then it’s much easier to share that with your partner,” she says.
Men and women
Get out in the morning light
Vitamin D is vital for optimal sexual function for men and women alike. For men, research has shown a link between low levels of Vitamin D and severity of erectile dysfunction, while for women, low levels can cause low oestrogen and, in turn, low sex drive.
Getting enough sunlight, particularly first thing in the morning, can boost levels, but Dr Melanie Angelova, who specialises in functional medicine at Optimise Health, recommends taking a year-round supplement. “The best time to start increasing your dose would be from October all the way until April,” she says. A major review of all the available research published in 2022 found that Vitamin D supplementation had a “significant positive effect” on both men and women’s sexual function.
Go cold water swimming
Studies carried out by the UK’s Thrombosis Research Institute show that immersion in cold water increases testosterone in men, boosting libido. The improvement in circulation it brings has been credited by some cold water swimmers for helping them overcome erectile dysfunction.
For women, an icy dip not only increases oestrogen and a surge of endorphins, the happy hormones, but has also been proven to reduce menopause symptoms such as mood swings and hot flushes.
Get squeezing
Although pelvic floor exercises are most often associated with women, kegels, as they’re also known, benefit both men and women. “They increase blood flow to the pelvic area and strengthen the muscles supporting the organs, improving sexual function for both sexes,” says Lee Mitchell, the head personal trainer at Jogger.
Contracting and relaxing the pelvic floor muscles in sets throughout the day has been proven to increase women’s ability to orgasm, boost the duration and intensity of orgasm, and improve vaginal sensation during sex. “People often don’t realise that for men, they can potentially lead to firmer erections and better ejaculatory control, ” says Mitchell. Time to get squeezing.
Practise the bridge and happy baby
One study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found that yoga improved sexual function in 75 per cent of the women over 40 who participated. After 12 weeks of practice, the women reported significant improvements across all sections of the female sexual function index (a widely used questionnaire to measure female sexual health): desire, arousal, lubrication, orgasm, satisfaction and pain.
For men, too, the benefits are well-documented. Research by Dr Vikas Dhikav, a neurologist from New Delhi, India, found 12 weeks of yoga made significant improvements in the male participants’ sexual function, including desire, erection, ejaculatory control and orgasm.
Donna Noble, a yoga teacher, recommends the bridge pose to improve blood flow to the pelvic region in both sexes. “Lie on your back with knees bent, lift hips off the ground, forming a straight line from knees to shoulders,” she says. For men, she also suggests the happy baby pose – lie on your back, bring your knees to your chest and grab the outer sides of your feet with your hands – and for women, the butterfly pose: “Sit with the soles of your feet together and knees bent outwards, gently pressing them down, to open the groin and improve blood flow.”
Keep doing it
According to research, men who have sex less than once a week are twice as likely to have erectile dysfunction, while women can find sex more painful. The simplest way to improve sex drive and function is to keep at it.
